Fly Read: Show Yourself Approved

3 Jul
Image found on Necole Bitchie.com

Image found on Necole Bitchie.com

I was my making my rounds on my favorite blogs and reading the reviews of the BET Awards and the story about Meagan Good and her dress was a recurring article. The commentary about Meagan Good’s dress really hit home for me because I had a similar situation. I recently moved back home and am having a hard time adjusting from living by myself in New York to living with my parents back home in Baltimore. That being said I got into a huge argument with my mother about three weeks ago because she thought I was inappropriately dressed to attend Bible study and therefore would not take me. I felt like a teenager being shunned and reprimanded because of my outfit. I had on a romper topped with a huge over-sized sweater and flats. The argument was probably one of the most serious arguments I ever had with a parent and I was so angry for two reasons: one, I am a grown woman and I can wear whatever I want and two, here we go with a Christian who is my own mother -judging.

I was heated. When I was in New York I attended Bible study every Wednesday afternoon and since I’ve moved back home, it’s been more of a struggle due to family dynamics to attend church and receive the Word as I would regularly while living by myself. Unfortunately I yelled at my mother about how she was nothing but a hypocrite. At that time I really felt in my heart that she was. Here is my own mother concerned about my attire more than my salvation. I’m not trying to be holier than thou but here I am a young woman who is yearning to go to Bible study on a Friday evening. To me that is enough, there is no more discussion, we should have just went to the Bible study. To her, an old school Christian she was more concerned about the image I was portraying. I yelled, “what image? That I’m a young adult at a Bible study on a Friday night?”

More importantly I did not feel uncomfortable or under dressed, she was more concerned about her comfort level. I went on about how Christians are so quick to judge someone without examining the true intentions of someone’s heart. Christians should only be concerned with their salvation and bringing others to Christ. What someone wears has nothing to do with where they will spend eternity. I spoke of the criticisms of Meagan Good’s dress on Twitter and one follower said two things, which reiterated my point of Christians focusing on the wrong things. I tweeted that we need to be less worried about what someone wears and more concerned about their soul and salvation, she replied with, “would you be comfortable if your first lady had it (Meagan’s dress) on? Her comfort is in question, the comfort of her husbands congregation is question.”

In 140 characters I replied with, “I’m not sure if my comfort has anything to do with her wardrobe. I am more concerned about how she serves in church.” My follower then said, “and that’s true beneath it all, sure. However her husband is a well-known pastor that’s the issue people have.” But the real the issue is in this statement, “and that’s true beneath it all.” It’s the truth-not beneath anything. The truth about being a Christian is to serve and tell others to taste and see how good God is and not to be concerned about the material things such as a dress worn to an award show.

The reality is that there is a war going on in this world and there are people who walk past a church every day wanting to go in but do not because they are afraid of being judge. The argument with my mother continued that there are Christians who get saved and then sit on this high horse acting as if they don’t have a past and now are fronting that they are all holier than thou. No one can bring a person into the church by acting like a cute saint, how can someone see how God changed you and now uses you if you are sitting there as if there was nothing to fix? God rode in to Calvary on a donkey not a stallion meaning you don’t have to be perfect to be used. He uses the Meagan Goods to bring young persons to church.

We have to get past this image of what a Christian should look like because it is deeper than a wardrobe. Our salvation is serious and saving others and bringing others to Christ is when you are being about church business especially if you are a first lady. I told my mother that I am not a nun but what I am is a child of God who yearns to serve God in spirit and in truth. My relationship with God isn’t a show and I’m not interested in putting on a show when I attend church, therefore she needed to get over this romper.

This whole controversy says two things; a woman’s body will always be a topic (you can be sexy but not too sexy and you can’t make anyone uncomfortable) and two, we are focused on the wrong things. Here we have Meagan Good who speaks freely about God being condemned yet someone who blatantly disrespects God by calling himself, Yeezus gets a pass. I was reading commentary on Twitter about the BET Awards and when Tamela Mann started singing, “Take Me To The King,” I saw tweets from people saying that they hate the gospel part of the award show and how they turned the channel. This battle as a Christian is serious and it is more serious than a wardrobe choice.

It’s ridiculous that a stripper can get a pass but a woman who publicly professes her love for Christ is called everything but a child of God because you can see side boob. After arguing with my mother I ran out the house in my romper so determined on attending Bible study even if she was not going to take me. I grabbed my Bible and starting walking down the street towards the main street in which I knew I could take the bus to church. As I’m crying and walking I past a gas station and a high school friend who lived down the street saw me. I hadn’t seen this friend in years but he was right there at the right time asking if he could give me a ride. In the aftermath of a serious argument all I could think of, was look at God. He knew my true intentions! I was a crying mess walking down the street and he brought someone along to give me a ride to church.

I told him about the fight and he goes, “she had a problem with you wearing this?” What she thought was inappropriate, my high school friend, who confessed that he hasn’t been to church in over seven years saw a determined woman making her way to a place that he hasn’t stepped foot in, in almost a decade. He was a blessing and I was a blessing to him by showing that I’m a young and active in the church.

All which goes to show that you never know how God will use you. While some are waiting to be cute saints, others like Meagan Good are walking into their purpose with a plunging neckline. In hindsight and after tearful apologies from my mother and myself, we both admitted to being extra. As a child I am supposed to practice obedience and as a Christian my mother realized that she was being judgmental.

There are some modest dressed hoes and some inappropriately dressed Christians but if you are a follower of Christ, we must realize the severity of bringing people to Christ. It’s more than a wardrobe selection and how you think someone should look. While people didn’t approve of Meagan’s dress choice, ask yourself if you are showing yourself approved to God.

Carla Thomas
Writer and Fly Girl

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